But just as a human living on the planet earth, you should have a couple favorite jokes in your back-pocket to crack up kids or shock the elderly. And, in fact, I don’t think I’ve ever met someone who loves telling those types of jokes who is the sort of person you’d want to hear a joke from. I’m not a big joke teller, in the sense of scripted jokes. But having a few go-to stories can be helpful in certain situations. Now, for the most part, you’re going to want the personal anecdotes you share to flow naturally from the conversation. They don’t have a single story that jumps to the front of their mind about something interesting that happened to them. Even people who have led very interesting lives. I sometimes ask people for an interesting story from their life, and it’s kind of shocking how this can paralyze people. Here are the things I try and keep a repository of: 5 Personal Anecdotes ![]() I find they come in handy specifically when dealing with people I don’t have a ton in common with, often kids, or just other people with whom I’m not likely to get into a “deep” conversation. But making note of these things and reviewing them every now and then allows me to have much better access to them in the situations where they might be useful. I don’t unload a bunch of these in a single conversation. Others-due to my interests-are magic-related, or tangential to magic. These are some stories, ideas, games, etc., that I have in the back of my mind, should I need them. So now, in addition to my 100 Trick Repertoire, I keep something of a 50-Piece Interaction Toolkit. I’m not stealing other people’s stories or opinions, I’m just making note of mine so they’re not lost to the ether. So I came to accept that idea that tracking this sort of thing was in no way cheating. The next day forget anything interesting ever happened altogether. Six hours later think, What was that interesting thing that happened earlier? Think, This will make a good story to share sometime. That immediately seemed like a much better system than mine which was: He was just making note of things he may want to share with others in the future, and he would regularly review those notes to keep them at the top of his mind. “Hey, you only have all those things to share because you wrote them down and remembered them!” But I changed my tune pretty quickly. And those that do are probably bad conversationalists in other ways,” he said. “I don’t think many people just naturally remember all these sorts of things. ![]() One was titled, “Stories.” Another one, “Trivia.” Another one, “Recommendations.” He had a different list for all types of information he might use in conversation. I wish I had such faculty with information.”Īnd then he pulled out his phone and said, “Let me show you something.” And he opened his Notes app and showed me some notes he had on his phone. And at one point I pulled him aside and complimented him on that and said, “I wish my mind worked like that. This guy had-I felt-more concrete contributions to give. I feel I’m pretty good in conversation, but my skill is more in the realm of the bullshitting, off-the-cuff conversational style. ![]() He didn’t make himself the center of attention, but whenever there was an ebb in the conversation he had something to contribute to keep it rolling.Ī month or so later, I ran into him a second time, and again he impressed me with his conversational skills and his ability to have something to share that was relevant to whatever conversation was going on around him. No matter where the conversation went, it seemed like he had an interesting anecdote, fact, or recommendation to add. One of the guests there was one of the most charming and interesting dudes I’ve ever met. About six years ago I was at a dinner party at my friend’s place in Brooklyn.
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